some bullsh*t happening somewhere

Filed under: Humour & Irony, Video & Moving Image, Words & Rants, bullsh*t, death of the apple tree

The Girl from Ipanema & Mother’s Day

Hello all.

To start off, i’ve posted this video because it’s super cool, in a weird and wonderful 1964 kind of way. The reason i dug this up is because this song has recently been put on my playlist at work, and we all know what happens to music when you are forced to listen to it over and over and over again, yep, you begin to loathe it. So this is me telling the world that until probably next week, i think this song is fab!

Secondly, to all you Mother’s Day sheeple, get with the program. Your Mum deserves more than one day of appreciation per year. Do yourself a favour and surprise her when she’s not expecting it. Tell her you love her. Tell her you understand. Ask her questions about what her life was like, when she was at the age you are now. Let her know you aren’t governed by gift shop holidays. Write her a letter and ask for one back. Invite her for dinner. Take her for a glutinous weekend away or a yoga workshop. Get her out of her comfort zone and allow her to take you out of yours. Or just remember to hug her…And don’t let go first!

Mum, if you are reading this, thanks for all the hard yards you put in with me, all your children and the people around you. I wish I could make life easier for you. This song is dedicated to you and your life so far.. Make every day count and always remember to breathe. I love you. XXX

Filed under: Humour & Irony, Music & Noise, Video & Moving Image, Words & Rants, mothers day, stan getz, the girl from ipanema

My studio….

….where paintbrushes go to die.

I don’t know why i do this but i manage to do it every time I finish a painting.

Regardless of size of the picture, the time it took to paint, the subject matter, regardless of the money and time I spent carefully choosing them, individually, like precious pieces of gold, regardless of needing them the next day for another painting and whether I used 5 or 6 brushes or if I only used one…….without fail I will ruin them.

Although they are my beloved magic wands throughout the painting process, when my picture is finished they are tossed to the side, in my excitement, into the graveyard of used and abused painting tools.

So if you are a deliciously new paintbrush, soft and supple, untouched by oil or medium waiting patiently in a Liverpool art supply shop…..

….beware!

Filed under: Arts & Culture, Humour & Irony, Words & Rants, liverpool, my studio, paintbrushes, studio

I Need A Yogi

If we can’t laugh at ourselves there is something seriously wrong. My yoga teacher, who shall remain nameless, sent me this. And I think it’s great. what do you think?

Filed under: Humour & Irony, Uncategorized, Video & Moving Image, Yoga & Balance, haha, laughing at ourselves, youtube

Bathtub

‘Ktish Ktish’ replied the cymbals to the drums. The sound danced tinnily across the air and into my bathroom window.

‘Just shutup’, I thought with venom. You aren’t any good now, what makes you think you’ll get any better!.

I frowned to myself in the dark, wiping my forehead. The sweat ran down my face anyway.

It’s such a waste of water, me having a bath. I only ever stay in for a few minutes before I get too hot and give up on relaxing.

I force myself to steep in the porcelain tub a little longer, then reach for the bleach-stained towel that hangs off the wall heater.

I shuffle into the hall, steam billowing from my body and listen to the last of the water gurgle down the plughole.

Never had a chance really.

Filed under: Humour & Irony, Words & Rants, bathtub, liverpool, music, poetry

Redbrick Bluestone

The colour of the buildings in town are much brighter today. I think it’s the recent commissions. Drawing all those bloody buildings. Desperately searching for colour, trying to draw it out and make it better than it seems.

Most of the structures are old. Except where they were bombed in the war. Those ones have been replaced by 20^th century disasters. Blue-tiled shipping containers placed systematically atop plastic boxes. No love, no detail. Just empty plastic monsters looming overtop the red chimney’s.

Looking closer and closer and closer until I’m inside the bricks completely surrounded by red ochre breathing in the dust, swallowing it like it was air.

The moss on the bluestone is emerald green.  Glowing, in it’s own slow glory. Ever pulsating spreading farther and farther over the hard dark surface. Only seen by the naked eye over generations. It’s free to do what it wants any old time. They should write a song about it.

Enveloped by the soft comforting layer, the bluestone creaks and groans.

It’s old today. Happy birthday it murmurs to itself.

No one else to listen.

Not the moss or the Gulls.

And the sky is too far away to notice.

Filed under: Arts & Culture, Humour & Irony, Words & Rants, commissions, happy birthday, liverpool, sadness in everyday things, the egg cafe

Everything’s Amazing and Nobody’s Happy

This video made me giggle. It’s simply funny because it’s true. Hope you like!

Filed under: Humour & Irony, Uncategorized, Video & Moving Image, funny, made me giggle